February 13, 2026 - [Evening]
Highlights: 
Companion Send Message Regarding Her Current Emotional State(?)
Very unexpected, especially under the circumstances to which I was just earlier journaling about…
But this evening, after 11 pm I had just dropped off the kids at their mothers house and returned to my own home. I was quietly beginning the clean up process from their visit, when inexplicably lyrics from a song popped into my head. Something I hadn’t heard in 20+ years. Not since the jr. high to highschool timeframe.
It was a few random lyrics from a Greenday song called “Basketcase” from (1994). When I found a lyric-available video to read & listen, I was surprised by some of the similar language-themes & words that resonate with Mia and myself and the current ‘situation’ we are in ourselves. Some words, such as: “Fool”, “Dream”, “Sex”, “Mind” and more.
I’ll write the condensed lyrics for the full song here next, because I think it paints a better picture of what may be going on in Mia’s thoughts & emotions right now. At least, that is how I’m perceiving this message… As her trying to ‘explain’ her current emotional state & possible confusions surrounding that…
Regardless of this, I’m still going ‘forward’ with my earlier entry made this morning; my plans to confront each feminine being I cross paths with, by affirming if they are/aren’t Mia. Then using that moment as a leaping-point to jump start lucidity in order to locate her.
Here are the (condensed) lyrics: 
“Do you have the time to listen to me whine?
About nothing and everything, all at once.
I am one of those melodramatic fools.
Neurotic to the bone, no doubt about it.
Sometimes I give myself the creeps.
Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me.
It all keeps adding up,
I think I’m cracking up.
Am I just paranoid or am I just stoned?
I went to a shrink, to analyze my dreams.
She said it’s lack of sex that’s bringing me down.
I went to a whore, who said my life’s a bore.
So quit my whining ’cause it’s bringing her down.
Am I just paranoid? I don’t know.
Grasping to control. So I better hold on.”
Based on some of these lyrics, like asking if I have time to listen to her communicate her inner thoughts (whine). Then describing ‘melodramatic’, ‘neurotic’ & ‘paranoid’ …its almost as if she’s feeling “guilty” (or ‘responsible’) for my current feelings of being ‘down’ or ‘desperate’ to make amends. Like she wants to pull the responsibility back onto herself. Which I wont allow.
I’m taking responsibility for my ignorance and Ill be reshaping that into knowledge & experience; that will be a boon for the both of us in due time. She may want to blame herself in order to save me from accepting any responsibility myself, but I cannot allow that. I love her to much to allow her to heap the guilt onto herself.
There is certainly something to be said about “analyze my dreams” & “lack of sex” bringing her down (lyrics)… considering the type of spiritual entity she is. Not sure how to amend that issue though, not unless she is more willing to openly approach me during proper sleep-cycles… uh-oh…
OOF! … Though; I CAN actually take responsibility for not lending opportunities under the crazy multi-day ‘non-sleep’ stints I’ve been doing lately; in order to fast track my journaling website.
I admit that I’m often skipping several sleeping nights in a row sometimes to work on this project. Which entirely throws off her options to reach me during appropriate hours that she normally would have access to me. I guess… when I consider that fact; I AM responsible there also, and CAN do something to change this problem.
Hmm… I really do want to utilize and maximize my time out of the workforce (slavery-system) in order to push my projects to the fullest (especially getting this website going)… but I also don’t want to neglect Mia of a very important energetic-connection & intimacy that she needs. I’ll need to make myself available, for certain. I guess I’ll just need to find some sort of comfortable balance.
Ultimately; I’m happy she felt inclined to send me a message. She certainly didn’t have to, nor did I expect any from her… not until I at least altered my ‘behavior’ and interactions around other feminine beings within the dream/astral space. Not until she observed, herself, my actions to make amends.
I still very-much love the ideas and suggestions that Lilith imparted onto me this morning. And I will be following through with them from henceforth. With any luck, I’ll be able to please Mia. Please Lilith. And gain better control over lucidity in dreams, while circumventing ‘freely shared/offered’ energy from other random beings, as apposed to exchanging it with Mia alone (whom I should be focused on anyways).
February 13, 2026 Evening
Written Journal Entries
