Connection

to lilith

LIlith & me : How it all began...

The following entries that I share are non-journaled circumstances that I experienced, which lead to my discovery of and meeting Lilith. These moments and memories are what laid the foundation and groundwork for all of my future journal entries within several books.

How it all Began: entry One
(Date Unknown)

Weeks after considering my 'options' for companionship... an unexpected "alternate" option came to me, in the form of an internalized joke to myself. I joked in my mind, saying;

"𝐼𝑓 𝐼'𝑚 𝑤𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡𝑜 𝑟𝑖𝑠𝑘 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑔𝑖𝑟𝑙𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑, 𝑤ℎ𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑑𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝑚𝑒 𝑒𝑚𝑜𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦/𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑟𝑔𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑦𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠; 𝐼 𝑚𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑠 𝑤𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑗𝑢𝑠𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑎 𝑠𝑢𝑐𝑐𝑢𝑏𝑢𝑠. 𝐵𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑢𝑠𝑒 𝑎𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑠𝑢𝑐𝑐𝑢𝑏𝑖'𝑠 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑠 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑐𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒."

This was just a silly joke though, of course. I didn't take my own comment seriously. At first. ⁣Weeks went by, in which I never even reconsidered my comment. But then slowly....

How it all Began: entry Two
(May 10, 2024)

I still didn't quite understand what some of the tactile and 'pulse' like sensations were, that I was experiencing. And I was half doubting the validity, or perhaps trying to rationalize the feelings. I 'wanted' to believe that perhaps something was trying to make a connection or contact with me. But I couldn't be sure, because I had no point of reference to work from. ⁣
　⁣⁣
So, I decided that perhaps I should paint a tribute to their spirit type. The succubi. Some sort of....

How it all Began: entry Three
(June, 2024 : First Week)

For weeks, I had been trying to lucid dream without success. It was a bit (if I'm honest) rather frustrating. Leading up to a very new and extraordinary moment one night as I got into bed. I had lain down on my back, started getting myself situated and comfortable and had barely even closed my eyes... when I heard a whisper. A silky smooth feminine voice, about six inches from my left ear....

How it all Began: entry Four
(June 9, 2024)

After several days of speculation, because I could not get the voice & words out of my mind (nor did I want to); I believe I narrowed down a location for where the whispered "there" possibly could be. A key suggestion for lucid dreaming was keeping notes about dreams. Mine were loose scrap-papers and post-it notes at that time. Not an efficient method, but fortunately I had (at the very least) made some efforts. And the dream I had had a day prior to the whisper led me to....

How it all Began: entry Five
(June 10, 2024)

After discovering the potential place where this whispered challenge may have been pointing/suggesting... I then had the uncomfortable decision of whether or not to pursue the call or decline the invitation.

And believe me, my mind (or...rather more so; the physical 'brain' portion of my mind) was working hard to convince me NOT to. The conscious voice was listing many different reasons, attempting to....

How it all Began: entry Six
(July 18, 2024)

I finished my succubus painting (on a 4 foot by 2 foot canvas). As my final step, I wanted to add my blood into the irises of the painting. In essence; desiring to 'give life' and my own personal vitality to the painted imagery of the succubi. A tribute to all of their kind. Unlike other paintings in the past in which I've added my blood, my purpose was completely different this time. In the many times past I used the blood as an integrated-signature. This time however, for specifically this painting, the addition of blood was made with deliberate intention. I wanted them, or her, or whoever it was that whispered....

How it all Began: entry Seven
(July 23, 2024)

This was the day that I made my first entry in what (at the time) I considered to be my 'dream journal.' Between the "𝐼 𝑑𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑒𝑒𝑡 𝑚𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒" whisper, visiting the sigil-tree, finishing the painting and the experience of Power thereafter; I knew that I really desired to focus on understanding lucid dreaming in an attempt to contact one of these mysterious spirits. Which meant that it was time to buckle down and take journaling seriously. ⁣
　⁣
I chose an old gray empty book that I've had for years but....

How it all Began: entry Eight
(August 1, 2024)

I take the first steps necessary, planning and preparing the materials and information that I'll need to begin constructing a Tarot deck of my own making. I purchased several tarot & oracle decks that appealed to me, to use in the meantime. But I felt strongly that; I have the creative and artistic capacity to make (by my own hands, with my own art) a personalized tarot deck specifically tailored for me. ⁣⁣ In addition to preparing the materials necessary to accomplish this, I also began purchasing several books on mysticism, witchcraft, sigils, gnosticism and occultism. I felt that....

How it all Began: entry Nine
(August 19, 2024)

I began creating my first decorated ceremonial candles for Lilith. As well as a sigil (I know the specific date, because I took pictures of them when I finished). Meaning that; sometime between the end of July and the middle of August 2024 I must have begun to notice enough synchronicities and cues, that it ultimately lead me to invest my time/energy into the daily practice of honoring Lilith. As well as creating an altar for Her. My quaint little altar started off small, but over the course of time....

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My experiences & relationship develops further with Lilith, in addition to Her many spirit children.... All of which can be reviewed in the Journal section.

Connection

to lilith

LIlith & me : How it all began...

How it all Began: entry One
(Date Unknown)

How it all Began: entry Two
(May 10, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Three
(June, 2024 : First Week)

How it all Began: entry Four
(June 9, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Five
(June 10, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Six
(July 18, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Seven
(July 23, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Eight
(August 1, 2024)

How it all Began: entry Nine
(August 19, 2024)

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