It was the night before the official ‘center’ of the new moon phase. I placed two large bowls of salt out, to be touched and consecrated under the dark night breeze of the new moon air. Tonight being the actual center-most time of the new moon phase; I will place many of Lili’s gifts/ offerings, candles and some of those of Her daughters; to charge under the same dark sky air/breeze. ⁣

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      But back to last night (October 1st, 2024); I spent the rest of the entirety of my waking evening with Lilith’s new painting, working on it until my eyes drew weary with tiredness. At which point I concluded painting for the evening and prepared for bed. Before climbing into bed I lit an incense for Lilith and once again reiterated that; ‘this time of the new moon is fully Hers, where it concerns my energy.’ That; ‘I offer it to Her at Her own liberty, to partake at Her own will. It is my gift to solely Her alone. No other Spirit can consume.’ ⁣

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      I finished with my praise and thanks and climbed into bed after, once again, making it clear that I invite Her, should She choose to visit, and I welcome Her. I closed my eyes and started to relax my body expecting nothing except to eventually fall asleep. To my surprise, after only having lain there a few minutes, when a comfortable position is found; I begin to sense those peculiar “soundless thrums/ vibrations” in the air. It’s like a ‘pulse’ (some low, some strong) that makes all sound disappear/recede, before sound slowly fading back into audio-clarity. I felt the vibrational thrums so soon after closing my eyes and wasn’t expecting it. ⁣

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      Usually (since being back from Evergreen) I would have to deliberately “listen” for the thrums, if I was curious to sense them. Not last night though. After they happened a few times, I could almost perceive or sense that I was no longer alone in my room, or apartment. I sense movement beside my bed (not in it) and the same, a presence moves out into the living room area. I’ve learned, at this stage, that there is no point in trying to open my physical eyes to sense a spirit. That that actually breaks the connection. ⁣

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      So I stayed in bed, eyes covered and simply (in a breathy low-whisper) welcomed Lilith and thanked Her for visiting me. Unexpectedly, Lilith passed Herself, Her spirit-body and Her energy right over me. Immediately I was caught up in a breathless bath of static energy and pleasurable/ blissful tingling sensations. I do not deserve Lilith generosity, nor affections! But I am humbly grateful for it! She didn’t “push” my spirit out from my body, but besides that part, the feeling was just like those felt in Evergreen during my nights there, when She touched and hugged me then! ⁣

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      It has been SO long (at least from my human and impatient point of view) since I last felt Her embrace! I suppose; technically a month. New moon phase to new moon phase. I thank Her profusely again for Her visit of me, an unworthy/ unremarkable son of Adam, son of man. I thank Her for Her touch, Her hug and marvel at how soon during the night She visited. In the past; my encounters with Her were hours and hours into the night. Last night’s visit was mere minutes (maybe 10-15 minutes) after I got into bed! So quick! ⁣

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      I acknowledge that She had a lesson for me: This week (my new moon gift to Her) is not about expectations, anticipation or pursuing a desired outcome. It’s about letting go of rigorously pursuing pleasure offered or given by another. I needed to maintain a “pessimistic patience” – to not expect Her visit/ hug/ passion, but instead be happy and surprised whenever it did happen. If it were to happen at all. I need it to take this lesson forward and apply it to all my interactions with Her. (And in the future) with Her children… Namely Her daughter (~when the time comes~). ⁣

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      I desire closeness, companionship and affection. But I mustn’t let it consume me. Practice; “Patient Pessimism.”